Switch
by hismysticmuse
Summary: Written for Breath of Twilight's: Countdown to Halloween 2013 When Alice dabbles in a little spell she accidently switches her family's personalities! How will they manage when they are all someone else for All Hollow's Eve? BxE, OOC, M for lemons


Switch

"Alice Cullen! What did you do?"

Edward was holding his head.

It was going to explode.

So many voices were chattering, it was as if his brain was on a warped radio frequency.

Then… it got quieter and quieter, until…. It was gone.

Alice gasped and started running from the backyard and into the house.

It took mere seconds.

"Oh, no!" She squealed her hands moving to her hair and pulling at it.

"Calm down, Alice!" Esme admonished, glaring at the girl. Alice had moved the rug when she ran in and Esme was in a bit of an OCD mood.

"No, no, no, nooooooo!" She whined. Her sight was becoming blurry. Then all the sudden her visions faded to black. "Who- who took it? I can't see anything!"

All the vampires were moving into the room slowly. Various looks of horror or awe etched into their faces.

There was an audible crunching and the screaming of an old whining truck.

Someone should really put it out of its misery, but Bella _loved it_ aka- it was her only bit of old, slow, and rusty freedom.

Bella came bounding through the door, her hair flying behind her.

"Does no one knock anymore?" Esme sneered and Bella turned to her with a gasp of shock as Esme is usually so loving! Esme then cupped her hand over her traitorous mouth and looked at Alice in horror.

"No, no, no!" Alice wailed, totally overly emotional.

The room seemed to spin with crazy.

"What did you do, Alice?" Bella glared, "And shut up, Emmett- or I swear I will find someone to kick your ass for me!"

Emmett gave a look of innocence that no one was buying.

_Sweet little perky ass, mmm._

"Who said that!?" Bella gasped. "Ugh! Emmett!"

_She should shut that mouth before I put something in it to fill it._

"I didn't say anything." Emmett frowned.

Bella closed her mouth right before she recognized the voice. It was slightly different than what she was used to, but it was his all the same. She turned her glare at Edward.

Who knew Edward was so pervy?

"And what would you put in my mouth exactly, Edward?" She sneered.

At least Edward had the decency to look embarrassed.

"You heard that?" It was then that Edward realized the self-loathing vampire gift of mind reading was completely gone.

His eyes darted to Rosalie, to Esme, to Emmett, and then to Bella- Bella, who wore a lovely scowl awaiting his answer.

"Yes, I heard you." She said. "All of it." Then her eyes darted from one person to another, reading various thoughts of her vampire family.

Esme,_ "Ugh, it's all about the pretty little human, nothing ever changes."_

Bella frowned looking at Esme in confusion. She didn't think she thought of her like that.

Rosalie,_ "This is boring. Wait- do I have to… pee? Vampires don't pee. Oh, no… Why am I seeing Bella pee? Oh, Bella needs to pee, I see it now. Why am I see Bella peeing?!"_

Bella rolled her eyes, but she did suddenly have to pee.

Emmett,_ "Why do I feel all whiney and sad and emo? I am not like this! I need to get out of here!"_

Carlisle_, "I wonder if the tulips I planted will come back this year._

Edward_, "Over a hundred years I've waited for a piece of ass… that piece of ass. Damn I want to tap that."_

And then Esme,_ "Thoughtless Alice and her excessive need to always mess with things! I can't believe I've been here doting on all of these indolent brats and for what? Ever? I don't think so. I'd rather get zapped by Caius and his death wand! Hmm, I wonder where he got one of those… eBay?"_

It was as if Rosalie was watching flickering pictures of what was happened seconds before. Then the pictures twisted, laid back out and Bella watched as Esme started rolling her eyes and huffing at everyone and everything.

She crossed her arms and glared.

"Hey!" Rosalie said with dismay. "I do not act like that!"

"I'm not acting!" Esme responded, her body recoiled as if she'd been struck OR smacked OR hit.

"Ladies," Jasper chided, he was oddly glowing a bit.

Emmett started to wallow. He just couldn't seem to get a handle of the emotional flares going on in the room. He didn't understand how Jasper handled it… no wonder he always looked like he wanted to kill everyone.

Edward though, he was standing at the hall tree mirror, checking himself out. There was some visible booty contracting going on before he turned to flex his barely there biceps.

Unfortunately, his lithe body had a sad show of muscles.

Jasper was sitting, his right leg across his right leg, hands tented together as he watched the show with a curious smile.

Carlisle, on the other hand was tweaking the flower arrangement on the small table in the entryway. His head turned side to side, taking the delicate blooms in, before he'd pluck a petal with odd satisfaction.

"I am bored. This is boring. It's like there's crickets in my head, it's so quite." Edward sighed. He finally turned away from the mirror only to find everyone staring at him. "What's that look for? I can't hear what anyone is thinking!"

"I can!" Bella screeched, "Unfortunately! And seriously, some things cannot be unheard, Edward! You were being perverted!"

Edward looked at Bella, with a mixture of awe and anger and then turned his glare at Alice, who actually looked sheepish.

"I can't help it," he sneered, "It's like I have Emmett's characteristics or traits or something. I feel like I'm surging with testosterone!" He gestured to his rock hard… uh… cock.

No one wanted to see that outline.

Well, Bella did, but… not there and not right then.

"And I got Jasper's estrogen!" Emmett sobbed.

"Okay, I may have dabbled a little." Alice admitted, reluctantly. She played with a lock of her hair as she avoided all of the eyes on her. "It's just that, I was accused of being a witch way back when and I thought, how hard can it be?"

Edward again, gestured to his cock.

"Yes, we know. You're hard, Edward. First time for everything, now get off it!" Esme sneered.

Edward grumbled, "I'd like to get off, actually."

The group of vampires and one human muttered and complained, spitting their dismay as they circled Alice. Finally, she had enough and yelled, "What? It's Halloween! It was just a simple, nothing spell."

"But you're not a witch, Alice!" Esme screamed, irrationally.

"I know that," she spat, glaring at Esme who was really becoming quite unpleasant. It was as if she was channeling Rosalie.

Alice gasped, eyes darting between Rosalie, who was sitting down in the corner with her eyes fazed, to Esme who had a raging bitch brow and fisted hands at her side. She may or may not have stomped her foot.

This was worse than Alice thought. She began to bit her lip, timidly.

"Seriously, Alice?" Bella spat, "You thought I was meek?"

"I didn't-" Alice stopped talking and sobbed, impotently.

"You did! In your head! I heard it! You said you felt meek like me and then said Esme's acting all bitchy like Rosalie!"

"Oh, _dude_!" Emmett bellowed, but instead of it being loud and boisterous it was more like Jasper's usual emo- whine. "What did you do to my girl?"

"Okay, everyone settle down now," Jasper's voice boomed over everyone's voice. "Let's get a handle on who's who, now."

The Cullens and Bella all made their way over to the dining room table. Jasper sat at the head, confusing everyone at first, until it dawned on the rest that he was the new Carlisle.

But not.

"It seems that Alice has made up a spell to make everyone's personalities and or gifts change."

"It's not like I meant to," Alice grumbled, "they never worked before."

"Well, they did on this All Hallows Eve, my love." He smiled condescendingly at his Alice; she gave him a meek smile.

Jasper as Carlisle was creepy.

"Okay, Bella obviously got my mind reading," Edward said with a weirdly Emmett innuendo eyebrow wave to which Bella scoffed with disgust and looked away.

Edward may or may not be remembering one of the nights where Bella had a sex dream starring himself.

"Edward is acting like Emmett." Bella was not impressed with his bravado shtick, "And is unfortunately- just as vulgar."

Bella now knew why Edward had such a brooding disposition, usually. Having to hear all of their thoughts all of the time was horrible and to not react or lash out would make anyone insane!

"_Mm, Bella, you look so fucking hot in that top. Just bend a little bit forward…"_

"How do we switch back?" Bella screeched, glaring at Edward as she sat straighter and covered her cleavage. "And when!"

"I don't know!" Alice cried. "Maybe it'll run its course and wear off… what do you see?" Alice turned to Rosalie whose eyes were hazy and distant.

"I don't know, I think it's broken." Rosalie sighed with frustration.

"Damnit Edward, enough, I get it!"

"What'd I do now?" Edward whined.

He was doing that a lot, you know, when he wasn't undressing Bella mentally.

"You know what!"

"Alright, alright, calm down," Jasper said as he stood up. "This is fixable, I am sure and when Rosalie finally sees a resolution then we'll send a text or call. Everyone go to your respective rooms or houses and try to relax."

"I don't sound all pompous, Jasper," Carlisle huffed and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Uh, yeah you do," Edward scoffed.

"Room, now! And take Bella! She obviously can't go home as a mind reader. Imagine what Charlie could be thinking at any given moment."

"I know what he thinks about and believe me, Bella, you don't want to know." Edward snickered.

"Yes I do!"

"You do? Really?" Bella nodded her head so Edward continued, "Your father thinks of two things, usually. One, he often thinks about fishing naked and two, Sue Clearwater naked." Edward smirked.

If Edward was feeling himself that tidbit would have never gotten out, but he wasn't.

So it did.

"Why do you think he likes the deep water and the 'sense of freedom that fishing gives him'?"

"Ew! Okay, please stop."

"Oh, and have Alice call to say you're staying the night, 'cause you'll hear all of his thoughts and you don't want to know what he does, when he thinks your asleep… about Sue or others."

No more talking, Edward. I mean it. I will get violent."

"As if you could ever hurt me, I am the world's most dangerous predator-"

"Yeah, yeah. Esme?" Bella turned to Esme who was already walking up to Edward. She lunged forward and grabbed his crotch and twisted as Edward cried out and fell to his knees.

"I've always wanted to do that." She said when she let go. Bella thanked her with a smile.

"Now, that that is settled, everyone to your respective rooms. Bella, you'll have to go to Edward's." Jasper sighed.

Carlisle bounded up from his seat, and led Esme away. "If you've got Rosalie's personality, we're about to have some interesting sex, right?" He looked hopefully at Esme who gave a knowing smirk.

ooOOOoo

"Bella, I don't want you to feel uncomfortable being in the room with me. I know that I'm not my normal self, but I respect you and that fine ass of yours. I also respect those perky little tits you have and the way your hair would look wound tightly in my fist."

"How romantic."

"Hey I can't help it!"

"Try." Bella glared.

Edward scoffed, "You like it! But really, I know we were going to wait and all, but I was thinking..."

"I know what you're thinking. I've heard your thinking all night!" Bella started pacing the room. She had been trying to seduce Edward all through their junior year, the summer, and now, deep into the fall of their senior year.

He never, ever bit the apple.

Edward was adamant about his need to wait because of his delicate sense of propriety.

Now she knew that was all a load of shit.

Edward wanted to fuck her.

Hard.

He wanted to bend her over the leather couch, with her back arched, face to the side, clutching the back as he circled her clit with his middle finger and his body thrusting so deep-

"Edward!"

"I can't help it!" He groaned. "It's Emmett's fault! I think he must have had an overabundance of testosterone and adrenaline coursing through him when he was changed or something because I really think if I don't fuck you I will die!"

"You said I'd be the one dying if you _fucked_ me." Bella countered, using his time worn words against him, except he usually said making love, not fucking.

"I know!" Edward ran his hands though his hair. "Maybe we can, you know, try stuff."

Bella sat down on the chair in front of Edward's desk. It was her only choice as she wasn't about to sit on the leather couch or the bed.

Edward was just a bit scary, but hot right now and she wasn't sure he was mentally there enough to be gentle.

Gentle meaning not breaking her or biting her or killing her.

She heard about Emmett and Rose's "love making."

She also didn't want their first time to be just a fuck on the leather couch with him holding her hair in his fist, no matter how many different ways Edward thought about it. But this was her Edward, at least on some level, right?

"We could try," Bella said with a small, nervous smile, "I mean, we've waited for so long and we love each other, right?"

Edward was nodding his head adamantly as he moved forward and kneeled before her.

He probably would have agreed to anything at that moment, but at least it was the truth.

"We'll go slow and just mess around a little," he conceded, happy just to put his hands on her bare, warm skin.

"We have forever." She smiled, opening her arms to her beautiful boyfriend.

He moved forward and engulfed her, taking in the lovely, flowery-fruity scent of her deep inside his lungs.

"You know, I've wanted you since that time we had to go hide out in the cabin, when James wanted you. No one knew what he was thinking and the way he was imagining you with Victoria and him… that really set me off."

"Oh, jealous Edward, I like." Bella laughed and he laughed with her.

"I was jealous! The way he saw you as a sexual object that he wanted to dominate and then eventually eat made me react, which made us need to run off."

"I remember." Bella said as she bit her lip. She was watching him carefully as he started taking off his shirt.

"I didn't want you to think I just wanted sex, so I have been holding off..."

"Sexually frustrating slash torturing me." Bella laughed without humor.

"Yes. Then when I made the stupidest mistake ever after Jasper wanted to munch on you..."

"Yes, finger straight in the mouth when I get paper cut. I know better now not to just sit and stare at it."

"That was not your best moment," he agreed, pulling off his shirt. "Or mine. Then off to Italy to save my dumb ass. I had to listen to Aro's disgusting thoughts about me. He is truly a scary dude. And I would not look good in pleather, no matter what he thinks."

"Yes, it's surprising he's married."

"She's a beard," Edward laughed, "and all about our friend, Jane, anyways. She's got magic fingers, apparently." He laughed, but it was true. "A bit of a shock on the bits and pieces really got something going there."

"Ew," Bella shuddered as Edward stood up before her, as she stayed seated.

He was right there! Inches from her face!

Edward enjoyed her blush, so he may or may not have moved his hips a bit just to see her redden.

"You're wearing too many clothes, Bella." Edward whispered.

"I thought you were going to do that part." She said in a breathy tone, but her hands moved down to the hem of her shirt and lifted it slowly up and over her head.

Edward stood and stared at the way her chest heaved and her nipples pebbled under the thing satin of her bra.

"Beautiful," he sighed. His finger lightly brushed over her clothed nipple and he smiled when it reacted to him and tightened further at his touch.

He lifted her up from her seat so they were both standing. He then led her into his bathroom and started taking off his pants.

He stood there erect and peeking out of his boxers.

"What am I thinking?" he moved toward her, as she was stood there, unmoving.

Instantly her mind went into an elaborate vision of how he wanted her wet and in the shower. The way their bodies moved together as she moaned wantonly, palming the walls of the misty shower enclosure. Her body was naked next to his as his strong palms held her up easily. Her leg was hitched around his hip.

"Oh," she gasped. Edward pulled at the clasp of her bra and enjoyed how it fell to the floor, exposing her to him. He then switched on the water, making it nice and warm before he dried his hands on the hand towel.

"I've wanted to get into your pants for so long," he smiled and she laughed, breaking the thick walls wall of tension between them.

It was good, because they both remembered that they were meant to be together forever and this moment was just this first of many.

"As I have yours," She smirked. She pulled the button open and then the zipper; the metal teeth were loud in their ears.

Slowly, Bella squirmed and lowered the pants, standing before him in nothing but her panties.

Edward pulled down the fabric covering his hips. Bella mirrored him and then stepped under the spray. Edward followed her.

"Where are the others?"

"They went to scare trick-or-treaters."

"Really?" Bella's eyebrows synched together, concentrating on his face and not the poking cock that was probing her stomach.

"No, not really. We don't usually get trick or trick-or-treaters this far out."

"I could see why, being vampires and all." Bella laughed.

"Yes, there's always that, and the creepy vibe we give out off."

"I like it."

"Well, that's because you're a freak of nature."

Edward snickered at his joke, enjoying Bella's scowl. He pulled her to him and placed a kiss over her mouth before she could say something biting, back.

He kissed her hard as his hands moved to her cheek, down her neck over her beating heart, and finally cupping her breast. He kneaded the flesh, enjoying the way she moved forward, head down and started panting out her breaths.

"Being with you is going to be so amazing, Bella." Edward groaned, as her hand finally moved across his chest and down over his stomach.

She stopped there, just feeling the way her body reacted to him. His fingers finally made their way down, cupping her and gently teasing as hers mimicked his and wrapped around his girth. Slowly she started to pump him as his finger moved to enter her.

With a grunt, Bella felt the intrusion and accepted a second finger when he pushed another one inside. Her hand moved quicker with his movement, sequencing it as if they were in a dance together.

Bella moved forward, her head resting on his chest as he played her like the same soft notes of her lullaby on ivory keys. Her body started to coil, legs weakening, and he had to support her as she came hard with sharp, deep moan. Edward was rewarded with the slick feel and scent of her essence.

Panting, after her orgasm waned away, Edward was swift with in asking for permission as their eyes met in a silent conversation.

He saw what he needed from Bella and repositioned them under the warm spray.

But then he stopped.

Gently he grabbed her around the waist and held her there for a moment.

"I love you, more than my own life." He whispered.

Then he did something surprising. He turned off the water and grabbed the towel, rubbing her down before he draped her body with it.

Once toweled, Bella stepped out and into the bedroom, followed by Edward.

She turned and looked at him with confusion on as to why he had stopped.

"I don't think either of us, although willing, want our first time to be in the shower."

Bella smiled and agreed. "Probably not. Perhaps we should wait until we're more ourselves."

"Bella, we've been ourselves for a while now."

It was then that Bella noticed there were no thoughts coming from Edward.

"Oh, thank goodness. That was annoying. I don't know how you deal with it for so long."

"A lot of practice," He scoffed shaking his head.

"Come on Edward," Bella smiled, pulling her vampire onto the bed, only because he let her. "I didn't get to see you come."

Edward's eyes widened. His body was instantly erect and ready for her touch.

"You don't have to-"

Bella jumped, still wrapped in the towel, onto his bed. "I want to. Lay on the bed, Edward."

Edward smirked, "I kind of like this side of you."

"It's always been there, you just rebuffed it!" Bella laughed but then turned sultry, "You haven't seen anything yet." She smirked, pulling off her towel and baring herself to him before she pulled the blanket over her head and went down.

Edward gasped, his eyes widening and then relaxed his suddenly rigid body, enjoying the ecstasy his Bella was giving him.

There would be time for engagements, a wedding, and even a honeymoon, but this, this exploration time together... Edward was going to savor it.


End file.
